A real longing for children and the uncertainty about when that longing will be fulfilled can feel incredibly tough, challenging and unfair. Why is it so easy for some to get pregnant, while others have to struggle for a long time? There is often an explanation and even help you can get, but in some cases you can’t see any reason for that missing plus sign on the stick.

Why is it hard to get pregnant?
There are several factors as to why it can be difficult to get pregnant. In part, it may have to do with age and lifestyle. It can also be linked to sperm or the uterus and eggs. In some cases, no real reason is found for the pregnancy to fail. In these cases, the advice is simply to keep trying, or review alternative routes to children.

When can you seek help for involuntary childlessness?
After a year of regular unprotected intercourse without becoming pregnant, it is possible to seek help. You can turn to a gynaecological clinic, women’s clinic or infertility clinic at a hospital. There, an investigation will be carried out into the causes of the infertility.

After this investigation, the doctor will suggest treatments based on the cause. These may include efforts to stimulate ovulation, sperm insemination or IVF. Treatment can also include lifestyle changes, such as losing or gaining weight or quitting smoking.

Is it difficult to get pregnant after a miscarriage?
There are no studies showing that it is difficult to get pregnant again after a miscarriage. The body often readjusts quickly after a miscarriage, making pregnancy possible again within a couple of weeks.

How to deal with involuntary childlessness?
There is no simple answer as to how to deal with involuntary childlessness on your own. Having a strong desire for children that is not answered will feel stressful on many levels. It can then feel good to tell friends and family and also explain how you wish to be treated when you are wanting to have a baby. By being straight with your loved ones about what support you need, there is a greater chance that you will get just that.

As a patient, you can get help with how to deal with involuntary childlessness by talking to a counsellor at the hospital or clinic you are at. The counsellor should be there to support you throughout the process.

How do I seek help?
If you want help investigating involuntary childlessness, you can contact your nearest gynaecological clinic. On health care services’ websites, you can easily find different gynaecological clinics depending on where you are. You can also turn to women’s clinics or an infertility clinic at a hospital.